How Embracing Mistakes Can Help your Child Grow
Making mistakes is often frowned upon — “why can’t you get it right?”, “why don’t you ever learn?” are some negative phrases adults may sometimes use on children. But how do you teach Instead, we should focus on how we can encourage children to embrace their mistakes?
So what is a mistake? Something said, or action arising from a lack of knowledge, misjudgement, or lack of focus. Making mistakes is not exclusive to an age group — young or old — it is a sign of growth.. So why do we continue to regard it with disdain and are reluctant to acknowledge the strength of making mistakes. Life is not a perfect science — there are ups and downs. Think about this for a second, when you reprimand a child for making a mistake — what message are you sending to the child? Mistakes are often seen as imperfection — a lack of capability, if you will. This can lead the child to be self-critical and create a sense of perfectionism that can never be fully attained.
We have to reframe mistakes as learning curves — as a developmental milestone. It is better to have tried and failed than never tried at all — this narrative will shape a child’s view on challenges and failures.
Teaching them to embrace their mistakes prepares them for a fulfilling life that encompasses challenges, failures, and success. It is about teaching them the realities of life.
Here's some benefits of how embracing mistakes will help your child grow.
1. Children become more confident to speak up
When a child makes a mistake, it is essential to react positively to it. Talking about it openly as a family will encourage them to do so. Through open communication, the child can explore their actions and feelings when they feel most vulnerable. When adults react poorly to making mistakes, it cripples a child’s confidence — they may feel discouraged from trying new things or even attempting activities they typically enjoy. It creates a fear of failure. We have to remind children that mistakes is part of growing up. When they feel comfortable talking about their mistakes, they are likely to grow confident in the knowledge that their parents are there to guide and nurture them to do better. For instance, when your child does his writing wrongly, instead of asking, “ Why can’t you even get this simple thing right?” ask instead “Would you like to try this sum again? I can help you with it?”. There is courage and confidence in owning one’s mistakes; we have to help children see that to boost their self-esteem.
2. Children become Self-Aware
Mistakes create vulnerability, and in that, we can teach children to find strength. Sometimes the best thing to do is to allow children to figure things out for themselves within safe limits. Self-awareness is a work in progress; as we study, work, play and simply live life, we learn about who we are, what drives us and what we are truly capable of. Children should have that platform to explore their experiences. They will soon learn to scaffold their mistakes and form meaningful experiences. Each obstacle is how we build perception and intelligence for the future. For instance, when a child makes a mistake and feels sad, they can handle and embrace their emotions. Don’t tell them how to feel, instead ask them,” Would you like to talk about it?” or “What can I do to make you feel better?”. A self-aware child will also display critical thinking and empathy.
3. Children become Independent
Embracing their mistakes allows children to build knowledge and skills, and with that, they will become independent. They will not be afraid to explore and chart through new experiences because they know they can make mistakes and won’t be frowned upon. It is possibly the most challenging thing for a parent as a child slowly learns to be independent. You may feel that they no longer need you, but that is far from the truth. As they come into their own, they need you to offer them guidance and a safe space. They need someone they can trust to tell them right from wrong. For instance, if your child spent all of their allowance for the week within a day ,do not chastise them. Instead, ask, “ Do you feel this will affect you at school? If they say yes, discuss possible solutions together This way, you are not rescuing them from a mistake they made; instead, there is a consequence — and a disciplined way out for them to consider.
4. Children take Ownership
When children are comfortable making mistakes, they will also learn to make their own decisions and stick by them. When they embrace their choices, children will know that they can make good choices that make them happy or make poor ones with consequences. For instance, if they forgot to complete their homework, let them handle it. It is their responsibility to remember to turn it on time. DO NOT rush to school with their homework. Allow them to understand their actions have consequences. . We must model how they can learn from making mistakes.
5. Children are Happier
When the stigma of making mistakes is normalised, it does not make for a healthy child. Through embracing their mistakes, children will learn that it is okay to fail at something. . When they can do that, they will be happier, and nothing will hold them back, for there won’t be a constant fear of failure. Instead, they will develop a growth mindset that will prepare them for all aspects of life. After trial and error, they will also learn to respect and enjoy the process when they achieve something. It is good to share with children that while the outcome is important, the journey is just as important.
At Lorna Whiston Schools, children are given the opportunity to be themselves in a safe environment through creative expression and critical thinking. We encourage children to communicate their thoughts and feelings creatively through a good story or simply by communicating with their peers. We believe it is essential to nurture and instil in our children the ability to express themselves from a young age and not to be afraid to make mistakes but to embrace it as a learning opportunity